Love vs Attachment
Are Love and Attachment the Same or what is love vs attachment, especially in Twin flame Journey?
Generally, we hear people using these words “I Love You”, “I am in love with that person”, “People fall in Love”, and “I Love you and cannot live without you”.
So is it really LOVE that they are referring to Or they are referring to something else?
To understand this, let’s first understand the difference between Love vs Attachment.
1 Love vs Attachment – Selfless vs selfish
When you’re in love, you are happy in the happiness of your partner.
You’re are happy to make your partner feel loved and fulfilled.
You aren’t keeping score, arguing over who helps more, or fighting over who is supposed to wash the dishes.
You don’t emotionally blackmail your partner, try to manipulate them, or seek to dominate the relationship.
When you’re merely attached to someone, you’re focused on the ways in which they can make you happy.
You become heavily dependent upon your partner and may even try to control them to avoid abandonment. For e.g. When Your partner does not call you for a day then it creates a fear that they might abandon you.
Instead of confronting your own issues, you use your partner to improve your self-esteem and fill a void within you. For e.g. You feel the need for pampering or appreciation from your partner and if you don’t get it then it upsets you.
You believe that they are responsible for your happiness and become frustrated and angry if they fail to bring you contentment. For e.g. you ask them to do a certain task or to be with you and if they are unable to do so then it upsets you.
2. Love vs Attachment – Liberating vs controlling
Mutual love allows you to be your true self i.e. you don’t have to create a fake image of yourself.
Your partner encourages you to be who you genuinely are and you won’t be afraid to expose your weaknesses. Instead, they will assist you in healing your weaknesses.
Mutual trust develops and becomes a powerful catalyst for personal growth for both of you i.e. as you trust each other, so you are not afraid that if you expose your weakness then your partner will run away.
Love is never controlling. In actuality, love transcends control.
Your partner’s ability to accept you for who you are and encourage you to pursue your dreams allows you to let go of the need to control your life.
Attachment, on the other hand, tends to fuel controlling behavior.
You may discourage your partner from spending time with their friends, play mind games, or put an unhealthy level of focus on pleasing them.
You may even try to manipulate them into staying with you regardless of their feelings.
For e.g. you are keeping track that if your partner is talking to other girls/boys and then feel upset about it or worse, you fight with your partner regarding it,
or in order to keep your partner near, you spend your entire time with them, even if it means ignoring your other responsibilities.
Manipulation and blackmailing include creating distance between your partner and his interests by any means, like hiding facts or lying, or twisting facts.
3. Love vs Attachment – Mutual growth vs restricting
If you’re in love, you and your partner will grow together.
When both of you work to become the best versions of yourselves, you’ll become better than you could have been on your own.
In short, your partner stimulates your growth, and you do the same for them i.e. As you are not afraid of showing your weakness, both of you help each other in healing these weaknesses.
Here growth doesn’t mean material growth only. Growth means that you heal the upsets that are caused by others’ behavior or unpleasant situations and thus you stay more in divine attributes like peace, joy, and acceptance.
In cases of attachment, your urge to control and your inability to solve your own problems restricts your growth as well as your partner’s.
Your unresolved issues cause unnecessary dependence upon your significant other.
Not surprisingly, this restricts the growth of both parties and makes it difficult to love in a healthy way.
For e.g. You may feel uneasy if your partner is unable to give you time. And instead of accepting it as divine will and learning to be on your own, you may ask them to give time. This demand of yours pushes your partner away energetically.
4. Love vs Attachment – Everlasting vs transient
Love survives the passage of time.
You and your partner may break up, be it temporarily or permanently.
If you were truly in love, however, that person will always have a place in your heart and you will continue to wish them well for the rest of their life.
If, on the other hand, you were merely attached to them, you will likely hold resentment after a breakup.
You may even experience feelings of betrayal.
These feelings stem from the assumption that your partner had an obligation to make you happy that, in your eyes, was not fulfilled.
5. Love vs Attachment – Ego-reducing vs ego-boosting
When in love, you become less self-centered.
Your relationship serves to reduce your ego, fosters your growth, and encourages you to become less selfish and more loving.
The relationship you have with your partner fuels positive changes for both of you.
More importantly, you’ll both have the courage to share your weaknesses, expose your vulnerabilities, and communicate from the heart.
Alternatively, relationships based on attachment are typically dominated by the ego.
This is why many people repeatedly fall into a continuous stream of unsatisfying relationships, each of which involves the same, recurrent problems.
You find it difficult to look within and resolve your issues.
This generates dependency within your relationship, which triggers the feeling that you can’t be happy without your partner.
You rely on your significant other to solve your problems or, at the very least, help you forget them.
After understanding the difference between Love and attachment, we can say that most of us confuse Attachment to be Love.
So if we replace the word ‘love’ with the word ‘attachment’ in the most popular quotes then they will become something like this:
“I love You” will become “I am Attached to You”,
“I am in love with that person” will become “I am attached to that person”,
“People fall in Love” will become “People fall due to attachment”,
“I Love you and cannot live without you” will become “I am attached to you and cannot live without you”.
Remember, the opposite of Love is not Hatred! The opposite of Love is Attachment.
How to accelerate Harmony with a twin flame?
So what is pushing away your union with your twin flame?
Setting an idea of marriage or togetherness as a goal in itself is the main reason that is pushing unions away.
It is LOVE that should be the goal, not togetherness as a “situation”.
Many Twins trip themselves up by trying to manifest togetherness as a goal in ITSELF, rather than manifest LOVE.
Ironically, when you are in a state of Love, it becomes a powerful magnetic state that pulls the togetherness to you.
In fact, we’re being asked by our spirit guides repeatedly to release the “obsession” with physical togetherness, as it is complicating and blocking things for so many Twin flame couples.
Instead, imagine the following cases.
– What if LOVE was the answer? The feeling, experience and state, and enjoyment of LOVE?
i.e. following our HEART? Following our BLISS?
– What if we focused on LOVE? Not the “Ego concept” of togetherness.
So, In essence, you can Focus on LOVE by Following your HEART, instead of focusing on the outer “picture” i.e. the mind’s abstract ideas of attainment and conditions such as “WHEN we are physically together, THEN I will feel content”.
This is because the idea of togetherness will only push togetherness away from you.
Have You Shut Off Your Heart’s Guidance?
To experience unity, you have to feel and dwell in and experience love RIGHT NOW.
You have to Tap into it.
You have to Feel the immense immaculate love that always exists between you and your Twin Flame.
If you are unable to feel it right now then it’s because you’re operating with your mind.
You’ve shut out your heart’s guidance. The heart always knows. Love is right there, once you choose to tap in.
If you are unable to feel that love right now then don’t be disheartened.
Lots of inner work needs to be done to feel this love, which includes the constant practice of higher meditative kriyas, plus energy clearing, plus constant support from your teacher/guide that will eventually help you to step up into your role as a Lightworker.
If you need our help and support, then you can see details of our inner work program.
So Are you in love with your partner or are you just attached to them?
Love can be complicated, but this video explains a few of the differences between attachment and real love.
We hope that these explanations will aid you in nurturing your current relationship or creating one based on genuine love in the future.
If you aren’t in love right now, we sincerely hope that you will find your twin flame and build a magnificent relationship with that person.
Until then, why not work on becoming a better and more loving version of yourself?
As the saying goes “Like attracts like”. If that’s the case, it’s wise to become the person that you wish to attract!
lifehack, Author: Thibaut Meurisse &
Twinflame1111, Author Cassady Cayne
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